Variations On Emotional Suicide, the new release from wurdz.click on the book to buy it today!

Sunday, February 27, 2011

clik clak,clik mack

he leaned forward,head in hand,and thought of their last dinner.it was a succulent leg of lamb~ which caused hunger pangs to ring out from his belly.he smiled and plunked out how he adored their time together~nothing else mattered when they made the sun stand still...the rusty royale rambled on as repressed love languished in his heart.it was a dream come true,the whirlwind romance they shared.falling into emotional fornication was never as fun.the nights entwined,the way their kisses transported souls on high...tap,tap,tap~it would be his way of showing how much he cared...how little the stares and whispers meant.tap,tap,tap~his mind was given unconditionally and his body followed suit.never had he dared to believe the liaison would lead to an entanglement of tender favors...his parents would never understand~neither would mack's.the noose fit just right.he closed his eyes on keys drenched in tears. poetry prompt courtesy of jackAZ photography

Saturday, February 26, 2011

calypso breeze

her brown skin~perfected and tanned by the heat of a golden glow~dances and twirls to the sounds of calypso in her mind...she loves to move.i watch and smile while thoughts of,lascivious deeds,drown my manhood with elongated dreams of rapture..she has traveled far,this dominican princess.her life has been an adventure filled rollercoaster~you need to be this high to ride.failures and moments of success have melded into the beautiful portrait she has become...she dances and dreams...her smile,bright and inviting,tell her story.she gives...she gives.yet there is no one to return the gesture.her heart pounds love and contentment for all that she adores,while the soul of a mother weeps to be heard.compassionate,erotic and pure.all and more adorn the character she wears.she twirls...and forgets the pain which surrounds her heart.steel drums mimic the pulse of a life still evolving.she is urban now~wishing for the smell of salt water and coconut palms...she gives,and cries...will anyone return the gesture?

Sunday, February 20, 2011

corner clair de lune

they had told him,as a child.that his claim to fame would be through strains of vivaldi~filtered over his love of that which was dark and devious.his parents assured the promise and he was content...until their passing.with years of guidance lost,the always easy world of play and be heard,wasted into cries of feed me...daily taunts of immeasurable pain which hugged his ego like daggers from the pit.he loved her,yet she despised him and what they had taught.she was his love now...and their offspring the catalyst.dreams were erased from the chalkboard of his desires~replaced with vulgarities for what he knew was real...so he dons the love of his youth,pours out debussy in A minor...while strangers pay for his family's next meal.

sweet surrender,pt 21

desmond sat looking at brenda as she quietly slept.the hospital room was dim and silent.he didn't know how much he cared until yesterday.the donation he made to help bury pam was something he had to do.a feeling that didn't leave.seeing her wounded helped him realize this woman had to stay in his life.he'd never cried like he did last night.''sir,would you like something to drink?''he looked towards the voice.a young nurse smiled at him.''um,no thank you.''''you've been here all morning.just thought i'd ask.''she walked away and his attention was back on brenda.she slowly opened her eyes.she tried to talk but her mouth was dry and stiff.''hey sunshine.how ya feelin?''she managed a smile.he moved to her and softly kissed her forehead.''you rest.i'll be right back.he found the nurse that had came to brenda's room.''excuse me,is there a donnie hogan here?''she checked her computer screen.''i'm sorry sir,he passed this mornin.are you a relative?he's had no visitors.''''no just an old school friend.thanx.''he walked back to brenda's room.she was sitting up.''hey baby.wher'd you go?''''oh jus check'd something.hey do you believe in destiny?''he pulled out a ring box and opened it.''if not,it's time to start.''FIN

sweet surrender,pt 20

''YOU PIECE A SHIT!''donnie stood and tried to kick desmond but the man sprung up and blocked the attempt.he grabbed donnie and pinned him against the island.''you a bitch,''he whispered in his ear.''just leave while you can!''donnie laughed.''sorry dawg,not in my nature.''a quick head butt made desmond back up.donnie reached for the gun and a shot went off.he looked down to see blood ooze from his side.he reached again and once more a bullet hit his arm.he looked towards a wall and saw brenda,slumped and breathing hard.a stain of red covered her chest.he looked towards the door to see lacey holding a .45 at him.''reach again and you die bitch,''she said with anger and focus.''i want you to.''donnie smiled his winning grin.he looked back at desmond and then at lacey.''you better kill me.cause if you don't,i'll make your world hell on earth.''''and if i shoot yo azz now you can see it first hand.your choice.''he looked at desmond who was ready to pounce.''you want her?keep that hoe.''he stretched for the gun.a single shot from lacey caught him in the neck and he fell against the sink.desmond ran to brenda and held her in his arms.sirens sounded in the distance.''hold on baby.hold on for me.''he wept as he rocked her...

Saturday, February 19, 2011

master of the game

at first you really don't give a damn about it,but then it gets control of you.the eyes are fixed straight ahead at the object of perception.suddenly,you realize there's a blink every few seconds.not only that,but also an occasional swallow.you try to minimize the actions while making sure nobody thinks you're a dunce...the eyes don't shut now and you realize you're master of the art~moisture is missing...swelling redness searching for a few drops of some size,only to be rewarded the silence of parched dryness.a friend touches your shoulder.you blink,strike one...answer with moist lips,strike two.the apathy is gone.

sweet surrender,pt 19

''so i'm supposed to just jump into your arms and take you back?really?''donnie gave a half hearted nod.desmond chuckled beneath his breath.the pan was starting to smoke.''wow.hey can i get this chicken off the stove?i mean since you the man in charge,you gotta realize this is gonna catch on fire.''''donnie let this go.i don't love you anymore.all i feel is pity and anger.we can't build on that.''now he was confused.''bruh,can i get this food off the stove?''''you know you holdin us hostage rite?''brenda reminded him.''JUS SHUT UP!BOTH YA'LL!''he pushed past brenda,headed for the stove.the two of them talking at once was giving him a headache.all he wanted was the love he once had.he grabbed the handle of the pan.that's when desmond acted.he kicked the gun from donnie's hand.it landed on the kitchen island and went off.donnie swung the blazing hot pan at desmond,emptying the searing food on him.the shock stopped him for a moment then he felt a kick to his side.as he fell,donnie clenched his fists and hit him in the back.''FUCK U!''he turned to reach for the gun but desmond tripped him.he hit his head on the side of the island and fell on his back.desmond crawled atop him but was tossed off like a rag doll...

sweet surrender,pt 18

''ok you gotta be kiddin me.''''nah it's the real deal nigga.i'm here to take back wat's mine.''donnie held the gun on the couple and walked towards them.''sorry i didn't get that wine.you got some smart shit ta say now?''desmond smiled as he held brenda close.''you know this a punk move rite?wat else can you do to look bad?''''wait?me look bad?i got the gun an bout ta have my woman back!aint that rite bree?''this was the worst situation brenda could imagine.she had prayed donnie would just go away easily.that prayer came up empty.he stood there in all his glory wide eyed and crazy.the same man she used to love,now sent a cold shiver up her spine.''AINT THAT RITE BREE?!''the light brown woman walked away from desmond and stood between the two men.''i was never YOURS donnie.i was just confused and needed security.i thought you gave me that.all i had was a scared lil boy that had to rape my sister to show his manhood...you never loved me.you just wanted to control me...and that's over.''donnie looked into the focused eyes of the woman before him.he had never seen her stand strong before.as he held the nine,her stare almost melted him and pierced his soul.''i never meant for things to go like this,''he pleaded.''i love you.''...

Friday, February 18, 2011

sweet surrender,pt 17

brenda was shocked at how calm desmond seemed.she got a broom and dust pan.sweeping up the glass she smiled as she thought about dumping it out the window.she settled for the trash can.''you ready to eat lady?''''i'm starving!hope it's as good as it smells.''desmond pulled a couple plates from the cabinet.''hey i'm good at wat i do.''brenda washed her hands in the sink and sat down at the island.''is that anything,or certain things?''she asked with a sly grin.''ma'm i cover the point spread e'r time.always bet on dez.''he put the pasta on each plate.he was about to go for the next pan when brenda reached out and pulled him back.they looked deeply at each other.he put the pot down and pulled brenda close.their lips met in a kiss that meant more than the first.his hand found the small of her back sending a current of electric up her spine.she held his shoulders and escaped in the musk of his being.he kissed her neck and she felt her emotions melt away.he cupped her face.''as much as i want you,this can wait.''she looked into his soft brown eyes.''wat if i don't want it to?''with that phrase,three shots went off.the door was kicked in.''YEAH FOOL!WAT IF I WANT YOU TA DIE?!''the two stood in shock as donnie closed the door...

sweet surrender,pt 16

''that bread smells good.''''it's my mom's thang.use real butter and garlic.''the sound of a breaking bottle caught brenda's ear.desmond went back into the kitchen to check his meal.walking to the window,brenda peered out.her worst fear had sat on her shoulders like a giant gorilla.donnie stood outside looking up at her apartment.''I SEE YOU!LET ME UP!''he was drunk and couldn't stand up straight.''I KNOW YOU GOT SOME NIGGA UP THERE!''suddenly she went numb.she didn't dare open the window and shout back.this was her time for happiness.she wouldn't expose desmond to this.she turned away and walked towards the kitchen.''did you have a dessert planned?''she asked taking her mind off the hell outside.''i've got a sweet tooth that's drivin me wild.''she was about to get an answer,when a crash surprised them both.they ran into the room to find glass all over the floor and a rock in the middle.''dam who piss off?''desmond chuckled.he soon found out.''DON'T WALK AWAY FROM ME!COME TO THAT WINDOW!''desmond gave her a look of concern.he walked to the window and looked out.''UH BRUH...SHE BUSY.BUT COULD U GO PICK UP A BOTTLE OF WHITE WINE?!PRECIATE IT!brenda was amazed at how calm desmond reacted.she knew that would make it worse...

sweet surrender,pt 15

the sweet smell of garlic encrusted chicken with spinach and linguini tickled brenda's nose.she laid back on the sofa and day dreamed.she thought of the last time she had a good home cooked meal.it was one pam threw together one evening over the summer.they were on their seclusion from men weekend.meatloaf with fried potatoes and onions.''how do you like your garlic bread?crispy or light?''she smiled listening to desmond rattle around in the kitchen.it was sexy and showed he could take care of himself.''crispy.BUT NOT BURNED!''she teased.that string of words brought her chef to the door.''ok so now ya sayin i can't cook?wow.''he dried his hands on a towel and threw it over his shoulder.''ooh aren't we sensitive,''brenda said laughing and looking scared.''honestly baby it smells wonderful.did you use white wine in the sauce?''''dam!you smelled my secret.i was gonna get you drunk and be a total azz.''''i don't cook with wine but i know it burns off.''desmond smiled.''you been watchin food network,huh?''he sat down next to her and kissed her gently on the cheek.''are you ok?''she fought back lingering tears and smiled.''yeah.i'll be fine.thank u so much.''''my pleasure.never pass up a chance to spoil a woman.''...

sweet surrender,pt 14

the talk lacey gave her on the way home helped only a little.when she walked into her apartment,the sights and memories of her personal hell were still alive and well.she actually didn't care what the rest of the family thought about her not being at the cemetary.she had to make sense of pam's death.she walked into her bedroom and picked up a picture of them in happier times.mean mugging the camera at kings island.she pulled the photo to her chest,fell on her bed and heaved heavy tears of pain and sorrow.''you coulda talked to me!you coulda told me!''the words landed on the walls and bounced back empty.she knew it would've taken time for her shy sister to admit something like that,but she'd still be alive if she had.she felt her pocket vibrating.she pulled out her phone and answered without looking.''hey.haven't heard from you.you ok?''the sweet voice of desmond caressed her ear.''hey.i...i just really haven't been in the mood.nothin personal.''''well i take not talkin to a new found friend very personal.how'd the funeral go?''brenda looked at the picture.the word funeral finalized it.''it was good.didn't go to the burial.''desmond sighed.''how bout i come make you dinner?you shouldn't be alone?''brenda smiled.''sure.''...

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

sweet surrender,pt 13

brenda's tears quickly turned to rage.''WHY THE FUCK DIDN'T YOU TELL ME?!''she yelled staring at lacey.''baby she wanted to tell you herself.i gave her that respect.believe me i wanted to shoot that bitch when she told me!''brenda looked long and hard at her friend and then fell back in the seat.''why?...why did he do it?''lacey put the sable in park.she sighed and leaned on the steering wheel.''he went over there cause she wanted a sack of weed for her and malik.it started gettin late.malik left cause he had to get up early.when donnie got there,pam asked him to smoke some with her.he took that as an invitation to do wat he did...it wasn't all on her.''brenda closed her eyes and shook her head.''you know he always wanted her.i could see it in his eyes.just never confronted him about it.''the women sat in silence for what seemed an eternity.brenda couldn't bring herself to cry again.and now she was ashamed to go back to the funeral home.''hey,i'll take you home.you get into your pajamas,make some hot cocoa and i'll be over later.i'll take care of the cemetary madness.''lacey put the car in gear and pulled off.being alone right now sounded good.away from the madness of her life.away from what seemed like hell...

sweet surrender,pt 12

''i'm sorry,''donnie said as he rose to leave.''you're rite.i'll never be the same in your eyes.i wish i could turn it all around an make it rite.''brenda stood looking at the man she used to worship.all she felt at this moment was disdain.she watched him walk out and hoped it would be the last time she saw him.all eyes and ears were on lacey and brenda.''anybody got a dam video phone?!take it all down!none of you know why she layin there dead!that bitch you saw leave is the one that killed her!''''bree,come on baby.''''no!all these phony ass family members.half of em didn't even know where we lived!''she snatched away from lacey and ran from the parlor.a cold breeze blew against her face and chilled the tears that streamed.she walked and ran then ran some more.the image of pam lying on her sofa lifeless wouldn't leave.what could she have had to tell her.the sound of a car,pulling up beside her,broke her thought.''girl get in,''lacey called out.''it's gettin cold and we need to talk.''brenda stopped,gave her friend a cold stare and walked to the car.she got in and stared ahead.''this is gonna be hard,''lacey started.''but donnie raped pam.that's why she came to you.''brenda looked at lacey and broke into tears...

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

purge

i usually don't watch her,this harlot of scorn~yet this time my fancy was pricked by the skin she wore.a sad black which clung to her bones like wet tissue.scrawny and voracious,the intent of her presence was not like any other...in times past,we would dine on the carcass of yesteryear.together,hand in hand,parading down brick roads of mottled gray.we would laugh and make merry until we had our fill...at that point,i would regurgitate the paintings which adorned the cracks of my sanity.nodding in unison,our souls would agree~another pound of flesh given in return for acceptance...this time is like no other.i hunger,i thirst for that which eludes me.finality sets in~the navy flows from my veins and another child lies naked on the hardwood of my psyche.

Monday, February 14, 2011

the apprentice,pt 27

chase reached to his side pulling his nine.''WAT DA FUCK IS WRONG WIT YOU?!''he aimed at nadine and pulled the trigger.the shot hit her in the side sending a spray of blood onto john.she looked at him in horror and surprise.''NO!this isn't how it works!''john yelled.''game show from the late eighties,''chase replied,watching nadine slide down john's leg.''no whammy's...that bitch don't mean shit to me.you're the one makin my dick hard,lover.''he winked at the suprised man.john made a move to fire at chase.he dove to his left over the hood of the cobra feeling the bullet whiz past his ear.he returned two shots hitting john in the chest and arm.the latter causing him to drop the weapon and fall backwards.chase walked over to him.he watched as the blood seeped from his wounds and mouth.''dam you fucked up huh my nigga.all because of a shithead young boy you trusted...was it worth it?''john smiled up at chase.''my type work will live on...you kill me another...will replace me.''chase laughed.''don't give a fuck.i got you.''nadine moaned and rolled onto her side.''just relax.sorry bout that.help's comin,''chase assured her.his phone rang.''speak.''''got that info,''sherry said.''somebody scrubbed their fingertips.nothin there.''FIN

the apprentice,pt 26

''MY GOD HELP ME!''nadine screamed.john punched her in the side and shoved the gun to her throat.he pulled her close,holding her between he and chase.he pressed his face close to hers as he spoke.''no love...he's a lot of things but surely not God.''chase puffed the black and laughed.''wow sick fuck like you know God?so why do the shit you do?oh and uh,the signatures ya left?they suck.''john let loose a sadistic and low laugh.''the great chase anderson.yes i know of you.in my circles i hear a bit of everything.i know that in this city you're the the so called shit.want somethin solved?get chase.but that makes me think of get smart.you can be prone to mistakes too.''''best believe fuck boi,the only mistake i made was not poppin you when ya came out that door.''WAT THE FUCK?!is this a reunion?!''nadine was desperate.''there,there cupcake.our boy here is just a blow hard nigger that gets to much credit for stumbling onto answers.''''wow...i like that.psycho babble101.make me angry so i'll do somethin rash...problem is,''he took one last hit of the apple black,''i flunked that class.''john laughed and licked nadine on the face.''see hot shot cops like you got a weakness.this bitch is it.''''you ever watch press your luck?''...

sweet surrender,pt 11

the organ played low,the choir hummed and the preacher pulled heart strings.lacey sat next to brenda and held her close.the week before the funeral had been pure chaos.if not for a last minute donation to the funeral home,the whole effort would've been a disaster.lacey was worried about her friend.she was so busy making things work that she hadn't had time to cry.''why is he preachin so long?he didn't even like pam like that.we ain't been to church since we were kids.''''it'll be over soon.he just want her to have a nice homegoin.''''i'm tired.i want this over.''brenda looked around at all the people she hadn't seen in years.none made her top ten list.she sighed and let her eyes scan the parlor sanctuary.her body tensed up as she spotted donnie in a back pew.''excuse me,''she said pulling away from lacey and squeezing down the row.she was halfway to donnie when lacey saw him.''shit.''she whispered and moved to follow her.''WAT THE HELL YOU DOIN HERE?!COME TO FUCK HER ONE LAST TIME?!''''BRENDA!calm down!''lacey tried to urge.she grabbed her by the arm but she snatched away.''bree don't do this here.i came to~''''give your respect?nigga the only respect you got is fa them streets!get out!how dare you shit on this!''...

sweet surrender,pt 10

brenda waited until donnie was out of sight before she opened the door.she picked up the flowers and neatly tucked them back into the green paper that surrounded them.a while ago,that gesture would have brought tears to hear eyes.this time all she felt was nothing.she walked up a flight of stairs to her apartment and turned the dead bolt.it was open.she turned the key in the bottom lock and pushed the door open slowly.''it's jus me,''came the small voice from inside.brenda was relieved and angry all at once.she walked in to see pam sitting on the edge of her sofa.''bitch,wat the fuck?''''bren before you get started jus let me explain.''''so not answerin your calls and texts didn't give you a hint?!i'm NOT tryna hear you!''brenda slammed the door shut and tossed the box and flowers in a lounge chair.''i didn't do it on purpose.''brenda leaned against a wall and folded her arms.''ok i'm sorry.so you just slipped up and fell on his dick.oh wait.you was drunk,thought it was ya dildo until you felt a body attached.BITCH GET DA FUCK OUTTA MY APARTMENT!''''bren,don't please.''''how the fuck you gon bring yo ho ass here?gimme my spare keys rite now!''pam reached into her coat pocket,pulled out a gun and shot herself in the head...

Saturday, February 12, 2011

the apprentice,pt 25

nadine screamed as the blood from billy trickled down her face.''i'll only ask you one time.shut the fuck up.it's only a little blood.now...ride or die?''the woman looked at john as she sniffed and shivered trying to settle down.''what?''john aimed the gun at her face as he stood over her.''i'm sorry.let me clarify that.RIDE OR DIE?!''''ride!ride!''''then move ya ass.by my calculations we've got about half an hour.''''wat?to do wat?!''he grabbed the woman by her arm and pulled her behind him.he turned and looked at billy's body one last time.''i've given you wat you could never get in life...respect and fame.''he put the gun in his pocket and pushed nadine out the door.a few people looked out rooms.''CALL THE POLICE!A MAN'S BEEN SHOT!''he shouted.he was counting on the confusion making his departure easier.a nosey man peered from a room.''lady are you ok?''john pulled his piece,aimed quickly and laughed as the man's head snapped backwards in a spray of red.nadine wanted to scream but cried instead.the exit sign blinked and sputtered from a bad wire.they took the stairs down two and three at a time.''move it nadine.''he shoved the door open triggering the alarm.''my nigga.wats good?''chase leaned on the cobra smoking a black...

sweet surrender,pt 9

brenda realized she was stuck.she couldn't say no to him coming or not go back to the mall.''sure...bring it over.''desmond smiled and pumped his fist.''cool!see ya in a few.imma close down now.''she wasn't crazy.she heard the anticipation in his voice as she flipped the phone shut.luckily she kept he keys in her pocket just in case that sort of thing happened.she was opening the security door when she heard the voice.''wat happened to your diet?''she turned quickly to see donnie standing behind her with a bouquet of flowers.her heart beat fast and no words formed.''baby look.i know i fucked up.i really,really understand you don't wanna see me.but i can't get you outta my mind.''''why are you here,donnie?i told you i need time.we don't work rite now.''the words made donnie sigh heavily.''just let me show you i can be wat you need.i been thinkin bout you since i left.''brenda moved inside.her emotions teased her but she had to be strong.she opened the box,got some icing on her fingers and licked it off.''was you thinkin bout me when ya dick was in pam?''that made his mood change.he slammed his fist against the glass door.''YOU TRIPPIN!''he yelled and tossed the flowers on the ground.brenda watched him leave.but for how long?...

sweet surrender,pt 8

a brisk autumn wind blew and swirled leaves around brenda as she walked towards home.she was angry that her emotions made her unstable.she was beginning to worry that the damage donnie had inflicted was deeper than she realized.''get a grip,''she thought aloud.''he was a dog and you sent him with his tail between his legs.you deserve better.''even though she said the words,believing was much harder.she looked at the cinnabon box in her hand.desmond seemed nice.she was ashamed that someone out of her life caused such a bad impression.she was more than halfway home when her phone sang out.it was the regular tone.she pulled it out and looked at the screen.''who the hell?hello?''''hey are you missin somethin?''the voice sounded familiar yet still unknown.''look,kick rocks nigga if you on them games!don't have the time ta~''''wait!it's me,dez.''''how you get my number?you a stalker!?please don't be that.''''wow you really need ta calm down.you left your purse on the counter.i took a chance that your number would be on something.''that's when she noticed her shoulder was bare.she had to leave it when she dashed out.another donnie disaster.''the kiosk is open another hour.you can come back or i can bring it and take you out.''...

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

sweet surrender,pt 7

brenda watched the man as he prepared the roll.he took glances at her as he poured the hot icing.her curiousty finally made her question him.''so,mr.sticky bun man,why you hangin out at a cinnabon?''that drew another smile from him.''this is my weekend gig.i'm a screen printer thru the week,''he closed the box lid.''and yes i make good change at my job.i wanna save up for a real vacation.''brenda reached for her purse.''no.this one's on me.''he said putting up a hand.''this won't make you stalk me will it?''brenda asked with a fake look of concern.''only if you want me to.didn't get your name.''she picked up the box.''brenda.and you are?''desmond.but please call me dez.my peoples were truly on crack when they named me.''they shared a laugh.''don't see you around much.you work weekends?''that feeling was back.a quick jab to the gut that brought her back to earth.most of her weekends had been spent with donnie.this was all new and frightening.''no.i,um...i have to be goin.''the sudden change shook desmond.''hey did i say somethin wrong?''''thanx for the roll.''she turned and found herself actually trotting away from the kiosk.away from the sexy smile and smooth skin.away from another man.she felt her eyes fill with tears...

sweet surrender,pt 6

brenda didn't think sitting alone in her apartment would be the best medicine at this point in her recovery.she threw on her favorite faded applebottom's,finished getting dressed and took a trip to the mall.the sounds and smells delighted her senses and made her feel like a kid.she was window shopping when the urge for a huge,sticky cinnamon roll came over her.''fuck it,why not?''she knew she was going back on her diet but she deserved some comfort right now.she endured the whispers and catcalls as she walked to the stand.it seemed empty.she patted the service bell with no answer.she hit it again.''ok,ok.dam!wait a min~''the piece of caramel that walked into view stopped his ranting and stared at brenda.she was pleasantly surprised also.''can i help you?''brenda looked the dream up and down.his broad shoulders gracefully tapered down to a nice waist.the slight smile he flashed was adorned by a sexy mustache goatee combo.his hair faded and wavy.two earrings topped it all off.''um,can i get a sticky bun?''the man smiled.''you know that's a setup right?''brenda was slow today,but quickly recovered.''ok we'll have none of that,''she chuckled.''how sticky~um,how much drizzle you want?''she watched the man squirm and smiled...

the apprentice,pt 24

john grew tired of watching the woman slurp down billy's dick.he stood,grabbed his clothes and put them on.he sat back down but pulled the gun from his pocket.''is it good,william?''the boy was to wound up in his mounting climax.''let's cut this shit short.''he cocked the gun.that sound got nadine's attention.she opened her eyes and pulled back off the meat in front of her.''DAM WAT THE~''billy went quiet at the sight of the .45 pointed at them.''time for work,don't cha think?''john said smiling.''pay the woman and get her out of here.''billy ran to his pants and went through the pockets.''where...where the fuck is my wallet?''''wats that?speak up,william.''the young man went through his pockets again.his mind raced.''exactly,''john said shaking his head.''you fuck-king idiot!what do you think you where doin?''billy looked confused.''cut the shit son!you been leavin coins at each site like you're a big time artist.that's gonna get us tracked...and get you dead.''''john i...i jus got bored and wanted to make it look...you know.''''like the bullshit you see in the movies?leave momentos to say you were there?''silence.''bullshit billy.''john raised the weapon and fired.billy's head popped like an over ripe grapefruit...

sweet surrender,pt 5

brenda decided a bath would calm her nerves.she gathered candles,an oil burner and put on some music.she grabbed her phone,put it next to the tub and eased into the hot silky water.she had used some mr.bubble and the the results were huge.she hadn't done that since forever.the vanilla bean aroma and smooth sounds of maxwell helped her eyes close and mind wander.just then,guccimane interrupted her thoughts.she looked at her phone.lacey.she dried her hand and answered.''is he gone,girl?''lacey was always right to the point.no chaser.''yeah.bout half an hour ago.''''how you feelin?''brenda paused and listened to the music.''it hurts SO bad...maybe i did the wrong thing.people change,lacey.''''but people change for them not you.you can't force a tiger to change those stripes.they use 'em to hide.donnie was a predator.he used you because he saw that weakness.''''but not all the time.we had our moments.when it was good it was dam good.''silence.''look don't start the rationalize phase.all you'll wanna do is think of shit to get him back in ya bed!own it.be sad for a while.you deserve it.don't feel like you jus gotta have him in your life.he fucked up.not you.i hear that dam maxwell,so finish your bath and call me back.''...

sweet surrender,pt 4

donnie looked at her and thought of the mistakes he'd made.he knew that her mind was made up.she would listen to his apologies in the past but this time she seemed different.he was determined not to let her slip away.''brenda all i need is a lil time to~''his phone went off.brenda shook her head and sipped the hot java.''time to wat,donnie?make up your mind on if my happiness is worth givin up your bullshit and workin together?problem is BRENDA doesn't have that luxury.go make ya lil weed run.''she sat her cup down,walked to the front door and opened it.''please don't make this harder than it is,''she said choking back her sorrow.he walked to where she was standing.he looked at her as she avoided his stare.''imma do it.you'll see...i'm sorry.''he moved to kiss her but she leaned away.''just leave...please.''he walked through the door and she quietlly closed it.she leaned against the cold wood and listened as he walked down the stairs.the show was over now.the tears began to flow in heavy streams that poured down her brown cheeks and made warm droplets on her feet.she turned the lock and slid down to the floor.her body shook from the cries of heartache that she let escape.it had to be done.today marked her new tomorrow...

the apprentice,pt 23

the look on boone's face was no doubt priceless yet chase had grown weary of the game.the smell of burned flesh brought him out of the clouds.as he walked out of the diner,he thought of how he actually missed tamika.the way she listened to him.glued to every word he said about her or the things he experienced.he wanted to see her but the timing was bad.he vowed to make time as soon as this mess was under control.he walked to the cobra and got in.he started up and peeled away from the madness.he pulled to the edge of the drive and slammed on the brakes.''you gotta be fuckin kiddin.''he got out and walked to the wallet lying open on the ground.he picked it up and a few coins dropped from the worn piece of leather.he pulled out the license.''mama get the peanuts,here's my pigeon.''he looked through the money and found a twenty with specks of blood on it.he shoved the wallet in his pocket and got back into his ride.''which way we goin boys?talk to me.''he looked up and down the street.he decided to turn left,driving away from the city.he looked into the rear view mirror watching the diner get smaller.''lets hope i'm rite about this.everybody needs a break...even fucked up morons.''he turned on the radio and drove...

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

alphabet lover

she is the beautiful angst that fuels my soul~in the midst of my pride,her hand seeks out my countenance.a smile,warm and frieghtening,beckons me~pulls me into the inky white sea which is my being...i succomb and dance to the syncopated rhythm of her mastery over me.we talk as music plays out scenes devoted to that which must be created.fuzzy...yet they glow with an intense dull pain.i know the pleasure well...the sweet perfume of vowels and phrases has become her calling card.i dare not blink,for she shall fade~leaving me with the stench of a thousand failures...so i succomb...i succomb.delight me with words devine for nothing satisfies as sweet.slowly,her gaze turns to sour cries of sorrow...she must leave again.my life will stand still~yearning for her birth once more.

Sunday, February 6, 2011

dance of the drunken reaper

feeding upon the souls of life once pure~they laugh.a sinister regurgitation of yore that curdles the skin.i hear them in my dreams and cry out...but alas~once more the fanged smiles have found me and lock in on the mockery of my deliverance...with feet as fast as tar,my escape,meticulously planned,has come full circle.the habitation of childhood haunts,stands before me as a collector...inside,they heckle the only ounce of decency i can claim.dozing...my train of thought is broken.visions of crimson,blue and gold return me to that night...the forbidden conversations with tattered flesh~searing,raking the stench of false hope throughout my mind.the pain is to much to bare~yet the courageous beating in my chest,extends a lifeline to memories untold.sleep well my children,for darkness is your eternal awakening.

Saturday, February 5, 2011

sweet surrender,pt 3

''wat happened to second chances?''that was a laugh.brenda couldn't believe this man sat next to her and had the nerve to talk about forgiveness.she had overlooked so many of his transgressions she'd lost count.yet here he was with those soft brown eyes looking for ball four.''donnie this isn't a game.my life isn't a revolving door that turns only for you.i have needs that go beyond a wet pussy.''he tried to hold her hand and she moved away.the coffee was ready and she got a cup from the dishwasher.''can we start fresh,baby.i'll make it rite.i'll even get a job.''his voice was sincere.but this is what always got her.that shred of hope.''no.this is it,donnie.you crossed the line...and i don't think you can change.''''man look,fuck the corner.i won't do it.i'll get a 9 ta 5 gig and make us work.is that wat you want?''the thug is what actually turned her on about him.but it all went wrong.lacey had warned her but all she saw was sexy,cocoa donnie.''see...you don't even know what i want.''she poured a cup of coffee,put in her sugar and cream and walked to the bedroom.she felt him follow her.they both sat on the edge of the bed.''i'm gonna take a shower,''she said sipping her brew.''when i come out you need to be gone.''...

sweet surrender,pt 2

''i'm fuckin human,bree!don't do this to us.''brenda turned back to the window and stared out.she knew that all donnie needed was an opening.the blink of an eye,a tear,hesitation in speech.he'd find that chink in the armour and rush in for the kill.she walked away moving to the kitchen and the sanctity of succulent java.he followed her every move as she made the brew.''now i'm a dam magnet,huh?''she turned on the coffee maker and sat down.''ok tell me,donnie.since you insist on trailin me like a puppy,enlighten me on why you had to fuck my sister.''the chocolate man leaned on the island between them and put his head in his hands.since she put it in such blunt terms,he wasn't sure of how to come back.''ya see sweetie?sounds jacked up when ya hear it from another source.don't it?''''baby it's not all cut and dry as you think!we were drunk,we'll i was drunk.''brenda stared at him,arms folded and void of emotion.''so drunk means fuck the closest thing around?''she rubbed her eyes.''how do you think i felt when lacey told me?i had to hear that shit from my best friend.and she told me not ta fuck wit you!''''man,lacey don't like me anyway!she wanted to see~''''she wanted to see me HAPPY FOR ONCE!''donnie sat on the other bar stool...

ravine hill,pt 14

he heard strains of an old church hymn in the background.it seemed eerie and surreal the way it punched at the chanting of the children.''pay no attention to that shit baby.fuck your wife and settle into your future.''leon felt his dick grow and his mind giving in to the sordid thoughts the voice put into play.''you're not ann.''''i'm ann in every way lover.i know you like me ridin that fat cock of yours.only she knows that...give it to me husband.''the children sang.the church song loomed in the distance.he heard his daughter brenda,her voice sweet and strong,calling out to him.''i like it,daddy.let's do it.''he looked at the hollow eyes and needle fangs of his wife.''this is our house.i feel it baby.we can do so much.''he turned his head and saw the mortician standing in a corner.his rubber gloves and leather apron covered in dirt and blood.he held an embalming rod that was connected to his mouth with a yellow rubber tube.''JESUS NOOO!''leon yelled in fear.he looked down at the pen in his hand.''wats wrong mr.douglas?just sign the agreement and the house is yours.''the realtor's hand rested on his shoulder.he looked at ann and brenda.''i think we'll keep looking ms.jones,''he said dropping the pen.''we'll keep lookin.''FIN

the apprentice,pt 22

chase pulled out the small plastic bag again.''am i the only one that sees the incompetence of chow's crew?''he put the silver piece in the bag and handed it to sherry.''prints.i need em fast,like yesterday.you up to it?''sherry rolled her eyes.''of course.i'm not a fragile little toy.''''great.call me when you get somethin.''he winked and was on his way.his mind raced thinking of the possible reasons the evidence was left in places so obvious yet not picked up.''chase.''he turned to the voice.boone was walking towards him.he wasn't in the mood and this wasn't the time.he needed to think.drama was the last thing on the wish list.''anderson...just wanna say...you know.''it was a sad,pathetic excuse for an apology.chase wasn't going to make it easy.''c'mon boy you can do it.''he held his hand up as if holding a treat.''you want a beggin strip?''boone took a stance but thought about it.''you'll always be a smart azz,huh?''''much better than a dumb azz.look i know you mean well.apology accepted.that better?but rite now i need to focus on this shit at hand.''boone smirked and shook his head.''we'll talk.go do you.''''funny phrase.that's all i can be.''chase walked away looking at the scene.''oh,tell tamika i said hey.''...

sweet surrender

brenda looked out her bedroom window at the falling leaves of autumn.the subtle hints of red,orange and yellow calmed her nerves and seemed to help take her mind off the situation at hand.''so wat you sayin is that you want me out of your life?''she heard the words repeated to her and she was sure of what they meant.that wasn't the case with donnie.''baby that's kinda harsh,don't cha think?''she tossed the words around in her head.yes it was harsh,but necessary if she wanted to move on with her life.the time she spent with him had become a game.one big series of unfortunate events that he always seemed to slither out of with cunning and grace.she turned to him and looked into the soft brown eyes that had hooked her.she fought back tears as she let her hand touch the face which made her melt.the lips that gave her screaming orgasms.it was time.''donnie,wat you did was wrong.i really can't blame it all on you,but it has to start somewhere.maybe i gave you to much power over me...i have to start over.''''so you can just throw wat we have away?just pack it up neatly and make believe we don't belong together?''brenda smiled and breathed deeply.''you gave us up,baby.you made the choice to do wat you did.not me.''...

the apprentice,pt 21

chase watched as the truck pulled away,siren blasting.''how you doin?''he asked,walking towards the entrance.''if you mean the ex,it's comin.i talk to a lawyer this week.''''well jus make sure it's wat you need not wat you want.big difference.''''it's messy in there,''she said following.the smell of burning flesh assaulted chase as he entered the diner.''take a look in the kitchen.''he gave sherry a crooked look and moved around the counter.the sight almost got to him.the owner's head was horribly burned.almost a pile of black and pink goo.the body still lay beside the stove and was in a huge pool of blood.''not your average minor league shit.this is big time.''''yeah.i got here before the place burned down.few more minutes and the grill would've went up.''chase moved around the kitchen looking at the body and surrounding area.''whoever did this was angry.but the head is just for show.''''why not the whole body on the grill?''chase continued his search.''because our girl did this.''he picked up a plastic tag,with angie's name on it,and sat it on the edge of the stove.''not on her own,''he continued.''she was forced into it.didn't wanna die.''one more slow scan and he saw it.another piece of metal glimmered under the stove...

ravine hill,pt 13

''gladly...''the voice said.leon ran down the stairs as quickly as he could.the pain in his leg was real even if the mouth hadn't been.it stabbed at his brain along with the decision of what to do.he heard the thing that used to be his wife hit the floor running.it was on the stairs and dragging it's rotting form closer to him.he slipped on an eyeball and fell the rest of the way down.''FUUUCK!''he heard a dull pop as he rolled to a stop at the bottom.a warm sensation filled his thigh and he knew he'd pulled a muscle.in an instant,ann was on top of him.''be with me lover.''the voice said seductively and low.''show me how much you BELIEVE.''her mouth opened and spread all the way back to her ears.the needle sharp fangs dripped with thick saliva.it ran down the lip and throat of her deformed body.leon couldn't move as the spit fell onto his face.''make love to me in our new home,husband.fuck me good!make me know you want it!''''NOOO!LEAVE HER!HAVEN'T YOU DONE ENOUGH?!''the beast leaned down and bit leon on the shoulder.the teeth felt like individual daggers all injecting hot,searing pain into his soft flesh.''this is our life.our destiny.let the hill take us.brenda is waiting.''leon struggled as he heard more voices...

Friday, February 4, 2011

the apprentice,pt 20

chase pulled the cobra into the diner's lot with a loud screetch.he jumped out and made his way through the growing maze of flashing lights and fbi unmarked cars.he scanned the area and found sherry.she was standing next to an ambulance.he trotted over.''bout time,''sherry quipped.''this is angela martinez.she's really weak and they gotta get her in fast.''''wat does she know?''''says it was two.a young boy and an older man.she~''angie screamed out in pain remembering what had happened.''HE TRIED!...HE TRIED TO KILL ME!''the words were muffled under the oxygen mask.''it's okay sweetie.you'll be fine,''sherry said calming her.chase walked closer before the emt workers pulled up the stretcher.he motioned for them to wait.''hey...my name's chase...pretty strong woman standing up to those fucks.you remember names or faces?''she turned away crying.''i feel that sweetie,''he leaned close and whispered.''but between you and me,i need to catch em and cut their nuts off for wat they did to you.''angie looked at him whith tears in her eyes.''i promise.''she bit her lip and began.''the boy's name is billy.bout 19.long stringy hair...''she looked away.chase knew she was afraid.''that's all i need.thank you.''she smiled and cried again...

ravine hill,pt 12

he looked at her skin.it was smoking and starting to char.ann looked up at him with pitch black eye sockets.the children began to sing again.''thirteen hundred ravine hill muthafucker!''came a deep scratchy voice from his wife.''he was a shit fa brains mortician that did his work while they were still alive!hee-hee.the embalming fluid ran through their veins and he watched while they squirmed.it is he who flows within the walls of this place...and you cannot stop him!hee-hee!''leon looked at ann as her skin continued to burn and her teeth grew to needle sharpness.''leave her.leave my wife alone...i believe.''''WAT DO YOU BELIEVE FOUL FLESH?!you know not of the one we serve.this house was his and shall always be!''leon slowly opened the hatch and prepared to make his move to escape the attic.the hollow eyes followed his every move and the children sang.he heard the sound of hands clapping a rhythm with the song.he looked towards the sound and saw three children playing.their faces and bodies mutilated and bloody.''no one is immune from the ravage,''the voice said.''you will fade into the history of this house like all others.''leon let the hatch down and jumped through the door.''come play wit me bitch.''...

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

the land of misfit boys

my eyes burn from a release that comes against my will.the pain sears my being and tells me that maybe the nightmare isn't leaving.the emptiness claws at me and beckons to the person that i used to be.i watch as he walks hand in hand with the one that makes all things better...the one that never seems to materialize.so i sing a song of desolation.the melody of which reminds of the times i should of been more caring,more understanding.but i was all those things and more.i became invisible for the sake of togetherness.yet i stand alone...staring out over the abyss of my nothing...longing for the touch of someone to make me forget,yet help me remember...fix me.they come again,the burning sobs and choking heaves.my mind yearns to be free but my heart...is misfit.

the apprentice,pt 19

''bitches,''he thought.he saw the woman when they had checked in.she had looked he and billy over sizing them up.this was her time to act.''sure sweetie,''he cooed and opened the door.''pretty girl like you needs to be with somebody.why are you alone at a motel?''''i'm not alone.i'm with you now.watcha hidin under that towel?''john looked up and down the hall before he closed the door.''so...you saw your mark and made your move.''she walked to the bed and sat down.''i don't bullshit.i'll fuck both of you for $500.take it or leave it.''john smiled at the boldness of the woman.he walked over to her and held her head up.''wat's your name love?''she was about to undo his towel.''nadine.''he stopped her.''nice strong country name.you born here in the city?''they heard the water stop in the bathroom.billy walked out.''no i was born in alabama.to dam slow there.''''now this wat i'm TALKIN BOUT!''billy was jerking on his dick as he yelled.''he's cute.''''then we'll take it,''john said moving to a chair.''fuck him and i'll watch.make sure you're worth the money.''''i knew you was a freak!''billy said shoving his dick down nadine's throat.john smiled as he stroked his wood.''i may be a freak to you.but i'm in control.enjoy.''...

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

ravine hill,pt 11

''I THOUGHT U WERE...''ann said in relief.she hugged her husband despite the stench from the dead creature.''me too...this house...this land.it's foul.we have to leave.''ann cleaned his face and shook the putrid thickness from her hands.''how?we've tried everything.it never stops.''leon looked at her silently.''i was dreaming while that thing was on my face.this sickness,the ravage or whatever,it feeds from the inside...off living tissue.you can't tell it's there unless you doubt it.''''but what is it?a virus.''''sorta.you how a cold gets worse before it leaves?kinda like that.''ann brushed her hands on her clothes.''so wat we need to do?''leon stood slowly.he rubbed his face on his shirt.''we gotta attack it from the inside.''his wife looked up at him with concern and fear.they had tried stopping the ravage,with no success,like normal people.now leon stood before her talking in riddles.she was frustrated and tired.''our child is dead.and now you say we need to attack this thing like a cold?why couldn't you think of this before?!''''shit i didn't know until that...box almost suffocated me.what's wrong with you?''ann buried her face in her hands and started to cry heavily and loud.leon wanted to hold her but hesitated...

wurdz GRABBERS